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So, at Mclean everyone is fucked up. They all seem so familiar there. They've all been through the same cycles. Why do we seem to all know eachother? Eachothers stories, eachothers cycles? We are all very close to THE GODPARENTS who i mentioned at the beginning of the story. They work at McLean, on Proctor 2 is where the Godmother is the head nurse... retraumatizing each sexual assualt victim survivor when they see her there. They are afraid of her. She compliments us and then insults us. Everyone there knows fear. We re-traumatize eachother in there without meaning to, and then, if we know to much, they send us to North Belknap where they dont care about you at all. They try to tell you that you have gone psychotic and you need medicine like Haldol to stop you from being crazy.
They keep shit on the bathroom floors for days, in the shower you feel dirtier when you get out than you did when you got in. The sheets on the bed are square so that you can never get comfortable. They give you 1 very very thin plastic pillow, they insult you and laugh at you. It's the ward where all the cool kids go to laugh at those of us who have failed the mafia.

So this is my story. Maybe now i dont sound like a troll. Maybe i do. I know my parents are freaking out that i am up all night writing this. I wonder if they are scared because they dont know whats going on or are they scared because they do.

I think, that like the rest of the fucked up Conneticut family, they are hoping i will kill myself or that someone else will kill me. Then it doesnt have to be their fault.
They are good liars. I am better. I lie to them when they lie to me and i have outsmarted them.
Its time for an appology. Its time some people go to jail.


May. 27th, 2008 06:55 am (UTC)
Have you invited your parents to read this? If not, it might help them fill in the blanks. It sounds like your mother and father tried to help you and protect you, but didn't know what to believe. Speaking from experience, it often meant believing the adult in the situation over you. I hope you can resolve this with them.

May. 28th, 2008 10:09 am (UTC)
real life!
I agree Jymi should let his parents know how he really feels, but the history is so convoluted...may be way past that time..hope he finds help though, as I am a long way away, a hell of a lot older but I care!
Jun. 1st, 2008 06:45 am (UTC)
Re: real life!
maybe i will show them some day, or if i am killed by the irish mafia, i'm sure they will read it then
Jun. 1st, 2008 06:44 am (UTC)
i dont think it would be safe for my parents to read this right now... plus it would really upset them i think


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