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Amy and i spent most days together. Some days i had to go to Andover to see my cousin Missi. She was always the jelous type. As soon as i got a new toy for my birthday or Christmas, she would break it. She broke my crayons when i tried to draw nice picures. She spread rumors about me behind my back and she hated every member of our family who i loved... which was all of them.
Missi is 11 days yonger than me. She is the 1st child of the 3rd marriage my uncle johnny, a good cop, with a temper as most cops have for reasons that now make a lot more sense. Missi and her father never seemed to get along, but her and her mother, a fat Italian ER rape crisis nurse who worked at Lawrence general, were always gossipping together and laughing when others were weak.
My aunt and uncle met at Lawrence General in the ER, because Uncle Johnny was a well known tough police man in Lawrence. Him and my grandfather, his father who had been a cop in Reading, were always fighting John and Cheryl had my cousin Missi before they were married. John was maybe still legally married to his 2nd ex wife when Cheryl got pregnant. They had a shotgun backyard wedding. I was there. Cake was thrown. i don't recall much else. But my "twin cousin" Missi always had it in for me. She was always jelous because i was skinny and pretty and talented. Missi was smart too. She even claims she remembers being born. She taugh her brother, John Jr how to read before he could even talk. We used to take him around to places to show him off. We'd take his 2 year old self into stores and tell them he was a genius, that he could read. We'd ask store clerks to provide some written material, and then we'd have John read it. Problem was, that Missi told people she taught him how to read, but no one was interested in what she had to say. She was old enough to read. They'd humor her and say "good job" but she was so so jelous of her brother for getting the fame for her skill. She loved to torture her brother. She lovd to torture in general.

So when Missi found out i had a new best friend, who was a "twin", she was jelous. She thought that her and i were supposed to be the twins. Why would i hang out with another twin if i had one of my own?
Missi made it her duty to go behind m back and try to make my best friend into her best friend and convince my best friend that i was shit. She started dating boys in my town and asking her mother to bring her to Reading (we lived in different towns) so that she could get together with my friends without me being there. She turned everyone against me, telling them that i was crazy and i was using them.

The summer before 8th grade, Hurricane Bob struck the area. It did not hit too hard in Reading, in fact, i spent most of the hurricane sitting on the roof outside my bedroom window where i would go to sneak cigarettes and wine coolers with Amy when she was over. On the roof i watched the Fitzpatrick family (a family of 9 kids, like my dad's family) who lived around the corner, try to ride their bikes down the street in the wind. It was just as crazy as me being on the roof. It was like we were all trying to get ourselves killed.

The day after the hurricane, a boy from the grade above me, who i barely knew except that he was popular and a jock, invited me to a party at his house. He said everyone was gonna be there. He said it was a make-out party and it would be fun. When i arrived at the party, i was greeted by only 3 boys. I asked where everyone was, and they said they were in the rooms (all the doors were shut) making out. Greg, who's house it was, told m to come up to his sister's room and he would provide beer. I told him i was no longer drinking, because even at 12 years old, i knew i had a problem with drinking. It somehow made me miserable. Was it the drinking or what happened while i was blacked out i did not know yet, but i told them i was all set with drinking.... plus, my parents had begged me not to go to the party. They said absolutely not... but i told them a bit later that i was going for a bike ride, and that was when i showed up at the party. i knew if i drank anything, my parents would know and i'd be punished, and no one else was there anyway, so it seemed a bit weird.

The 3 boys took me to the sister's room, and before i knew it, they were all on top of me. two help me down while the other finger fucked me and bit my boobs. They took turns, and at one point while i was being restrained and raped, another boy came in the room and took poloriod pictures of me. I didn't know why until 8th grade started. I left the "party" when they were done. I was ashamed and sore, and my blue stretchy shorts had blood on them, and it wasn't period blood. I had to walk my bike home because it hurt too much to sit on the seat. This was the price of being a whore. I wasn't going to tell anyone i failed, so instead, i went home and called Amy and bragged to her about my sexual conquest.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
May. 27th, 2008 06:39 am (UTC)
Just wow.
Jun. 1st, 2008 02:58 am (UTC)

no kidding...
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )


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